Foster to Adopt

30 Sep

I took last Friday off because Andrew and I both had to go to the county meeting to get information on fostering to adopt.  We have definately not made any decisions yet, we just went to the meeting.

It was pretty boring.  Not inspirational (‘you can make a difference in a kids life”) purely informational.  But I do feel a little more aware and at least know where to start if we decide to go this route.  Here are a few things I found out:

– Whoever watches our kid on a regular basis, nanny or day care while we work, has to be liscensed and finger printed through the state, but if we just need a babysitter for the evening, they don’t.

– Everyone has to foster for 6 months before they can adopt.  However, we can choose to only take in children who are available for adoption.

– We can choose to only take a ‘relinquised’ baby (that means the parent willingly gave them up) but we run a risk of that parent having 30 days to change their mind.  We could prepare emotionally and physically, spend a month with a child, and have it taken away.  That part really scares me.

– We can choose to only take children who have been taken from their parents from the state, but in that case, the chances that the baby would be drug-exposed or abused goes way up. 

– To my understanding, during those months while we would be ‘foster’ until we adopt, the state would give us some money as a ‘reimbursement’ to help care for the child. 

– It is free.  We wouldn’t have to spend thousands of dollars to adopt.

I am trying to process whether or not Andrew and I are willing and capable of our first child being one that could possibly come with such baggage.  I would love to say that my heart is completely open – “bring me any abused or special needs child and I will care for them” – but the reality is, I am not there.  To be real, it kinda freaks me out.  

I started reading a book about adoption that a good friend gave me.  On the first few pages, the woman who wrote the book (and had adopted her own) said that she and her husband had to decide “if they wanted to reproduce, or if they wanted a family.”

I don’t know the answer to that question yet.

2 Responses to “Foster to Adopt”

  1. amfunches October 1, 2010 at 6:13 p10 #

    Mark and I are currently in the process of becoming foster parents. We are half way through the classes/licensing. The things you learned are basically the same here in TX. We are excited to do this and hope it works for you and Andrew should you choose to go that route!

  2. alicia October 5, 2010 at 6:13 p10 #

    I have a ton of experience in this area… email me if you have questions.. Sorry, I’ve been a blog stalker for a while now.. 🙂

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