First appointment

18 Apr

Andrew and I had our consultation appointment at the infertility clinic.  It went really well.  Our doctor is nice. 

I won’t start any tests for another few weeks but Andrew did his already  (that was interesting).  When they know for sure that I am not pregnant, they will shoot some dye into my tubes and take x-rays to make sure everything flows through okay.  Then they will do some blood work.

Before we went to our appointment Andrew and I talked about how we felt about going.  He wondered if we were doing the right thing because he didn’t feel ‘desperate’ to go.  To be real, I don’t either.  But I think this is a good place for us to be.

I don’t want the infertility clinic to become our priority.  I don’t want to be so desperate that we are willing to put all of our money, all of our resources into this. 

I am hopeful, but if we do find out that something is wrong, if we find out we can’t have our own kids, here’s where I am at:

Will I grieve?  Absolutely.  I will be heartbroken to know that I will not carry my own child, be pregnant, experience the nausea, the baby kick, trying to figure out if our baby looks more like me or like Andrew. 

But… there are too many kids out there who don’t have a home for me to spend all my resources and energy on the possiblity that we could have our own. 

I don’t know what God’s plan is for us.  I am trying to be open to whatever He decides for us, knowing He will walk us through it.

5 Responses to “First appointment”

  1. jenny ewalt April 19, 2010 at 6:13 p04 #

    Proud of you guys… Love you both

  2. Cristine April 19, 2010 at 6:13 p04 #

    Praying for you two.

  3. Nicole B. April 19, 2010 at 6:13 p04 #

    I’m glad you posted this afterall. It never hurts to have people praying for you. Love you, friend.

  4. Kristen April 19, 2010 at 6:13 p04 #

    Hi Becca, this is Kristen (Pettit) Leonard. I found your blog through Aly’s, and even though I haven’t seen you in ages, I wanted to drop you a note. Mike and I are in the same boat – we’ve been trying to conceive for 2 yrs and have done all the tests, etc. We just did our first iui, and are waiting to see if it worked or not. If you ever have any questions about any of the tests or processes, feel free to email me…been there, done that! In the meantime, we will be praying for you guys, that God will direct your steps in this process! 🙂

  5. Mel April 22, 2010 at 6:13 p04 #

    Thank you for sharing. Hubby and I are very open about IF, probably a little too much for some people! But we’ve learned of a whole prayer army out there for us because of it, for which we’re humbled and grateful.

    We’re going on 5 yrs of “unexplained” and haven’t done any treatments yet (for several reasons). It’s okay to take your time and pray and wait and see.

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